I have been there and I promise that once you get to your late 40s or even 50s, the world starts to look a lot different. You’ve collected pain and heartbreak, tragedy and loss, and you start to understand the pessimism that plagues your age group... and yet, the world also looks brighter, calmer, and things start to make a lot more sense. You realize the world is dominated by hormones and the need for connection, and now you wake up feeling like you are watching a play unfold before you. You realize it’s always been about just you - even if you’ve had children - and now is the time to find beauty and joy in every moment that you can. Hugs my friend. I just discovered your channel recently and I love it. Thanks for being you.
This reminds me of when my fiancée and I first started dating. He was poly, I was not, but I was willing to give it a try. For four years my anxiety grew as I tried to be something I wasn’t. Then one day he told me he wanted to be monogamous. It was like a deep breath I had been unable to take for four years, not knowing I hadn’t been breathing. Everything changed. The beauty of our relationship started to unfold in ways we never knew love could. My anxiety is gone now, like the heaviest weight lifted from my shoulders. We continue to grow in joy and laughter completely satisfied with one another. Everyday is like a tiny miracle.
This piece is so sad to me and so familiar. Peace be with you.
Brokenness lead to discovery. For me, I suppose, I needed to be alone for it to happen. Sure did hurt though. Even now. I’m glad to have been found along the way. Prepared for what’s next. Stronger, a more complete me. Some trust and innocence were replaced by wisdom at the cost of a path that I hope to never walk again.
I feel the pain in this post. I _know_ it. Many do. There are so many ‘silent keepers of the soul’ protecting what is left. My prayer is that we all find trust again in the trustworthy and peace in the middle of the storm.
I'm always impressed when someone can somehow build something beautiful out of something horrible. I makes me sad, but gives me hope too - because it shows you haven't been overcome by it. Keep that beautiful spirit!
I had to scroll back up to the top again to see the "true story" part. Keep on writing! If some women think they are fulfilling life's ambitions by mucking around, "kinking" with a married man, may they live to want to have a child and a quiet, cozy life, never to find it.
Dec 6, 2022·edited Dec 6, 2022Liked by the radical center
Butter, oil, cream and cinnamon?! Looks like I've been doing coffee wrong all these years! But seriously, that was an unexpected but enjoyable gear shift. [EDIT: "Enjoyable" wasn't the right adjective. Apologies. The part about it being a true story didn't properly sink in when I first read it. Quite a gut punch, actually.]
I have been there and I promise that once you get to your late 40s or even 50s, the world starts to look a lot different. You’ve collected pain and heartbreak, tragedy and loss, and you start to understand the pessimism that plagues your age group... and yet, the world also looks brighter, calmer, and things start to make a lot more sense. You realize the world is dominated by hormones and the need for connection, and now you wake up feeling like you are watching a play unfold before you. You realize it’s always been about just you - even if you’ve had children - and now is the time to find beauty and joy in every moment that you can. Hugs my friend. I just discovered your channel recently and I love it. Thanks for being you.
This reminds me of when my fiancée and I first started dating. He was poly, I was not, but I was willing to give it a try. For four years my anxiety grew as I tried to be something I wasn’t. Then one day he told me he wanted to be monogamous. It was like a deep breath I had been unable to take for four years, not knowing I hadn’t been breathing. Everything changed. The beauty of our relationship started to unfold in ways we never knew love could. My anxiety is gone now, like the heaviest weight lifted from my shoulders. We continue to grow in joy and laughter completely satisfied with one another. Everyday is like a tiny miracle.
This piece is so sad to me and so familiar. Peace be with you.
Brokenness lead to discovery. For me, I suppose, I needed to be alone for it to happen. Sure did hurt though. Even now. I’m glad to have been found along the way. Prepared for what’s next. Stronger, a more complete me. Some trust and innocence were replaced by wisdom at the cost of a path that I hope to never walk again.
I feel the pain in this post. I _know_ it. Many do. There are so many ‘silent keepers of the soul’ protecting what is left. My prayer is that we all find trust again in the trustworthy and peace in the middle of the storm.
I'm always impressed when someone can somehow build something beautiful out of something horrible. I makes me sad, but gives me hope too - because it shows you haven't been overcome by it. Keep that beautiful spirit!
This is really good writing, and I say that as someone who minored in creative writing and writes as a part of their job.
I didn’t want this to go where I could tell it was going. Well done and thank you for the change of pace!
I had to scroll back up to the top again to see the "true story" part. Keep on writing! If some women think they are fulfilling life's ambitions by mucking around, "kinking" with a married man, may they live to want to have a child and a quiet, cozy life, never to find it.
"Poor Damn Fool"
- Harry Chapin
Singer of sad songs:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fMqJYNb5JrY&list=RDMM&index=6
Butter, oil, cream and cinnamon?! Looks like I've been doing coffee wrong all these years! But seriously, that was an unexpected but enjoyable gear shift. [EDIT: "Enjoyable" wasn't the right adjective. Apologies. The part about it being a true story didn't properly sink in when I first read it. Quite a gut punch, actually.]
:/ <3
Heartbreaking, beautiful and honest. Thank you for sharing this.
Impressive writing, wish it were really fiction, but still... that's a sad way to end it, hope you'll have some new pieces soon.